The school year has just begun, and many parents are already starting to look for useful literature and advice? Today important topic- discuss what to do if your student's grades leave much to be desired. How to save your nerves and inspire the student.
Many children by the age of 12-14 begin to lose interest in learning. And even if in elementary school it was easy for you to motivate or force you to complete all the necessary tasks and study well, now the child is more and more interested in spending time with friends or in gadgets, lingering on walks or “hanging out” at the TV. The children's organism is so arranged that, due to age and immaturity, the student himself does not yet understand the importance of education. Therefore, the task of the parent:
Show all the pluses and benefits of a good study. Explain to your child about future career opportunities and wealth, how they depend on the quality of education and knowledge.
Pay attention to your student's hobbies, identify interests and talents, see what gives the child the greatest pleasure. Encourage hard work in non-school interests and hobbies.
FROM early age instill a love of learning. This is impossible to do as a teenager, responsibility develops over the years.
Don't use blackmail. As a parent, you must be clear that blackmail methods backfire. "There will be triplets, you won't get a new phone." Of course, I want a phone, only study begins to cause more and more disgust, as it is perceived as a barrier between the desired and reality. Communication with teenagers is a very subtle and delicate topic.
Child's trust
It is not easy to gain trust and respect, and it is even easier to lose it. If a child lives in constant fear and hears threats and blackmail, then you are unlikely to build a trusting relationship. If you have this communication problem, root it out as soon as possible. Communicate with the child, talk more about interests, find out what items cause joy, clarify and understand which items you don’t like and why. Do not impose your opinion, listen. It is important for a child to see that you are next to him, on his side, and not against.
Praise
Everyone loves her. Celebrate the achievements of the student, encourage them, praise them. AT primary school this is enough to instill a love of learning. At any age, any person will appreciate affection and praise! A win-win.
Hobbies and interests of a teenager
Every child is talented. No time is an excuse. Make time for your hobbies no matter how busy you are. Find out what your child likes. In addition, often the hobbies of a teenager can be associated with school subjects, for example, your daughter may love books (literature, Russian, history), is fond of computers (computer science, English), dances well (physical education), and so on. Does your son play a lot? Talk to him about the process of creating games? What knowledge might be needed for this? Computer science, programming, design and so on.
Children are our reflection
The best upbringing own example. I am deeply convinced that if mom and dad work and constantly learn new things, improve and are attentive to the child, then he will be drawn to everything new, show interest in learning. Share your emotions and thoughts. Were at an interesting conference - share your impressions at a family dinner. Got new project- Tell us about this, rejoice with the whole family. Success is contagious.
Knowledge is everywhere
Sending a child to school and being sure that everything should be taught there is a mistake. Education in Russia is far from perfect. In-depth study, hobby groups, access to additional literature - provide your child with opportunities. Waste your time on additional education schoolboy.
Independence
A very useful quality! Responsibility and security are closely related to it. Communicate, tell the teenager about the need to be responsible. Whether it's doing quality homework without parental supervision or behavior at breaks and on the way home from school. Build parallels between success in school and admission to a university.
Money motivation
A great way to give your child the opportunity to show their positive qualities and earn extra pocket money. Consider a reward scale. At the same time, it is worth limiting spontaneous purchases"wishlist". Let your teenager earn money for the desired thing with his own labor.
"Work will make you a man"
In a running situation, it also works well. If laziness is the main companion of a teenager, then work on it. You can limit pocket money and allow small earnings, for example, during the holidays. A low-paying job and a schedule "on your feet" will help you understand all the delights of low-skilled work. And in contrast, you can talk about prestigious work in office centers, walking past them.
Choose the recommendations that are right for you and try to introduce them gradually. For example, you should not immediately come straight to a teenager with tuition fees and offer money. Praise individual achievements, encourage them, gradually offer to systematize them.
Communication rules if a teenager does not like the topic of study in principle.
Transitional age is not an easy companion of adolescence. Right now there is a risk of losing authority in the eyes of a teenager. Sharp condemnation from parents and constant conflicts lead to rejection of studies, the child may begin to skip classes out of spite. They want to prove something! What - they themselves do not always know, but they really want to do it out of spite. Feel like adults.
Rules that will help in communicating with a teenager:
- Respect the personality of the child, talk to him on an equal footing, do not humiliate or call him names.
- Set certain rules of conduct. What do you allow and what is strictly forbidden in your family.
- Listen to the child, ask leading questions, get arguments. Dialogue will always be beneficial in building relationships. But solid notations - on the contrary, they will stand a wall between you.
- Do not immediately deny criticism in your direction. Find out the situation. Try to put yourself in the place of the child and understand.
- Explain the importance of education, the need for school knowledge for later life.
- Sincerely ask your child about school matters. Chat with him. Indifferent and formulaic questions generate formulaic "okay" answers.
- Be proud of your accomplishments, celebrate progress, don't skimp on praise.
- In case of difficulties with homework or school curriculum try to help, explain, ask the teacher to help or even hire a tutor. Misunderstood material today entails big problems in the future.
- Failures happen. Do not dwell on condemnation for poor grades, support your teenager. Think together about how you can improve the situation.
- Talk about goals. A teenager must understand what he is striving for, what you want to achieve and what knowledge he needs. Determine the aptitude for the sciences.
- Reward and praise specific accomplishments. Match your expectations with the real possibilities of the child.
- Do not compare grades and achievements with peers, do not discuss classmates.
- Love your child.
Every parent has the power to instill in their child a love of learning. Don't ignore the tips above. Think about them and try to put them into practice. Motivation is important for the development of purposefulness and responsibility.
Awareness of the need for education comes with age. On the initial stage children learn for parental recognition and praise. It is important for them to know that mom and dad are proud of them. And only in this case, a desire is born to move forward and develop, when the child knows that he is valued, and he "will not let you down."
Do not make a cult out of study. Do not study for days and do not read constant lectures. Rely on the interests and talents of the child, and then study will be a joy and pleasure.
We hope that our Tips on how to motivate your teenager to study were helpful to you! We wish your children success in their studies! Share your experiences and stories in the comments!
For the first time, all the children go to the first grade with pleasure, but after the very first holidays, the desire to learn from many simply disappears.
Hopes of knowing the world and gaining new fascinating knowledge can simply collapse in one moment. There may be several reasons, but there are ways to eliminate them. It is enough just to figure it out and not be lazy to devote enough time to this process.
There are schools where high school students tend to respond in class the same way they did in first grade. And this happens where talented teachers work. If your child's school is tense with such, you will have to try yourself.
Why does the desire to learn disappear?
From time immemorial, both at school and at home, "forced pedagogy" has been operating. Therefore, instead of the joy of gaining new knowledge, we hear from elementary school students that they are afraid of rabid dogs, earthquakes and .... This is how our kids perceive learning: like earthquakes in case of a wrong answer in the lesson!
The task of parents and teachers - not to instill fear of getting bad grades, but to develop the student's abilities, teach him to think and learn. But an earthquake or a mad dog cannot develop the ability, right?
Parental Mistakes
We ourselves kill the child's desire to learn. Who wants to love math if one missed lesson means they have to sit at home doing their homework instead of playing hockey with their friends? So we only develop the student aversion to study .
Parents often put pressure on their offspring, saying that they themselves studied only “good” and “excellent”. Understand that now your child's load is many times greater than it was once with us! You can see for yourself with what a huge heavy backpack he goes to school and how much time he takes homework.
Adults have come up with value system : if a child studies well, then he is a good person, if he is in the ranks of the lagging behind, then he is bad. So not only will you not teach your baby to love learning, but you will also develop an inferiority complex in him that will not allow him to become happy in adulthood.
: “Good schools are those that children want to go to, they strive to acquire new knowledge and stretch their hands in class even in high school. The secret of the success of such schools is the absence of forced pedagogy. If a child is not afraid to get a bad grade or arouse the resentment of teachers, this will make him a free, relaxed, confident person in his strengths and abilities. Such a child will grow up to be a full-fledged and serious adult.
How to instill a love of learning?
Parenting by Success . If earlier the child did not understand or did not know how to do something, and then learned to do it, it will help to realize the magnitude of their own capabilities. Support this joy of learning in a small student - throw him new and new tasks, increasing their complexity as you progress. Such an ability to get carried away, thirst mental labor determine the level of development of the child.
positive example . It is important for your fidget to see that his parents are also constantly learning something, and they enjoy and benefit from acquiring new knowledge. Remember that children repeat everything after their moms and dads. So sign up for the course. French, dancing, designing airplane models, collecting them - such a pastime will benefit all family members.
Active . We understand that on a day off you want to lie on the couch and do nothing, but this will not help your child's development. Go to museums, theaters, exhibitions or concerts, then discuss everything you see. Such children's curiosity will gradually be transferred to study.
Presence effect . Self-fulfillment for elementary school students is a task, at times, almost supernatural. If you leave everything in the same mode, then you will have to sit with your child until the end of school. Try to create the appearance of your help in completing the lessons. Be there when the child is preparing, but at the same time go about your own business, just keeping a little eye on the student so that the student is not distracted.
Denis Filonenko, Doctor of Pedagogical Sciences: “Most often, the parents themselves are to blame for the lack of interest in learning in a child. He learns well only when he is interested in the subject. On the other hand, interest appears only if the child knows the subject well. We get a vicious circle. Therefore, the role of parents, their perseverance and desire to work with the child is so important here.
Overcoming difficulties . Teach your student to derive satisfaction from overcoming difficulties. Together with him, celebrate any, even the most insignificant victory, praise him and rejoice for him. Let him feel what it means to be a winner.
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We develop attention
The ability to concentrate on a subject is the basis of good study. There are many ways to train attention, willpower.
Method number 1. The child stands with his back, and you lay out several items on the table. Then he turns. Examines objects for 3-4 seconds, and then turns away again and lists those that he remembered. Then you can rearrange items, add until the student gets tired.
Method number 2. Hang colored mugs on the wall in the nursery. In the same 3-4 seconds, the child must remember and say the name of the colors: red, blue, green, yellow and in reverse order. A month of training allows you to remember 7-8 circles, which is equivalent to memorizing 3-4 pages of a textbook after the first reading.
Oh, how hard it is for me to learn!
Write lines exactly in a row,
Examples are difficult to solve!
I want to frolic with the guys
Mommy, don't make me
You play with me "to school"
Where in all the lessons, as in the game,
Interesting for you and me!
(Anna Kubat)
As part of the campaign "Education for all children!" we continue to talk with parents about how to properly organize educational activities your child. The psychologist of MBU SO "Crisis Center" - Anna Kubata answers the parents' questions.
Many parents often ask themselves: How to make a child interested in learning? Why does the child not want to study?
In fact, if a parent asks himself such a question, then most often, a rather banal answer comes to mind - because of laziness. But in fact, everything is much more complicated. After all, the child’s lack of interest in learning can be provoked by the parents themselves, making unbearable demands on their child.
We suggest parents to use some recommendations that will help to competently organize the educational space and raise a positive attitude of the child to learning.
First, take a look at yourself.
What are your requirements for your child? Do they correspond to his age, abilities?
It is useless to force a child to study for hours if he is still junior school student. At this age, the leading activity is the game. A child at this age is not able to sit still for a long time. Such a load can cause nervous strain. The time allotted for lessons should correspond to the age of the child: no more than two hours with a 15-minute break every 45 minutes (taking into account the individual characteristics of the child).
Secondly, if you demand only excellent results from your student, each time criticizing for lower grades, get ready for the fact that he will develop a negative attitude towards learning due to fear of punishment and negative attitudes towards him from adults.
In addition, the child develops a fear of making a mistake, which will certainly happen due to constant tension - attention is scattered, and the child is mistaken. Hence the complexes, self-doubt, and as a result, a lie (“they didn’t ask anything”, “I already did everything”, “loss” of the diary, etc.).
To avoid this, reward your child for good grades, for his efforts. If, nevertheless, a bad mark is received, do not scold or criticize, but on the contrary, support: “I know you tried! Next time you will definitely succeed!”
Thirdly, each child needs an individual approach to learning, taking into account his temperament.
By temperament, we understand the type of nervous system that determines the speed and strength of the course of nervous processes. There are four types of temperament:
phlegmatic, sanguine, choleric and melancholic.
It is useless, and sometimes harmful, to demand from a child with a phlegmatic temperament fast completion of tasks, as it nervous system is inert and unable to quickly "engage" in any activity and dynamically perform it. Such a child should be given more time to complete the task and not rush it.
But the child- sanguine the fast pace of work is easy, but to complete the work begun and not be distracted is a difficult task for him. It is desirable to interest such a child in such activities that concentrate attention and require careful execution. It can be designing, folding puzzles, needlework. It is necessary to encourage the sanguine for his perseverance in completing tasks.
The child has choleric temperament difficulties may arise due to excess energy, restlessness, inattention. First of all, you need to release the accumulated energy. The ideal option is to engage in mobile sports. Needlework, modeling, drawing are also suitable for training attention. Cholerics are always in a hurry! Explain to the child that the main thing in work is quality, not quantity.
You need to be very careful with your child. with a melancholy temperament. Such a child needs constant support from people close to him. The slightest failure plunges him into despondency. The task of parents is to teach the child to see mistakes as a positive experience, to praise him for his successes and be sure to tell him that you believe in his strength and that he will be able to cope with the task.
Fourth, be a role model for your child.
Tell him about your school years, about successes, about performances at olympiads and competitions. Think about your favorite subjects and teachers. Look through school photos together, tell about your classmates, in a word, form a positive attitude towards school in your child. Also play mind games with the whole family to broaden your horizons and nurture the need to learn something new. Play with your child "to school" by doing homework. Use various colored cards, pencils and felt-tip pens, magnets, constructors and various other items that will arouse the interest of the child and diversify boring math examples for him, texts and rules in the Russian language. So you will receive not only completed homework and a good grade, but also the child’s desire to start such an entertaining “game” again next time.
Fifth, help your child do their homework.
If you do homework for a child, you will take away from him the opportunity to learn to think, to develop independence and responsibility in himself. The task of the parent is to respond to requests for help if the child is at a loss with this or that task, but the help should be in the form of a given vector, hints so that the child can develop his mental abilities, learn to solve the tasks assigned to him.
Another important detail is the organization of the child's workplace..
It should be a comfortable table located in a well-lit area. Where there is enough space and there are no distracting objects and noises, such as TV. In this case, you can also show creative ingenuity: stick multi-colored stickers with mathematical formulas, exception words on shelves, walls. Well, if there are diplomas and thanks, then hang them nearby in frames so that, looking at them, the child remembers previous successes and strives for new ones, increasing self-confidence and self-worth.
The main thing to remember is that the child needs the support of adults, a sincere interest in his success.
Be patient and attentive during the school stage in a child's life. Take a closer look at yourself, are you too categorical and demanding, remember the wise saying of the classic of Russian literature N.V. Gogol: "In order to educate another, we must educate, first of all, ourselves."
Good luck dear parents!
Emily Listmann is a private tutor based in San Carlos, California. She has worked as a social studies teacher, scheduling coordinator, and SAT prep teacher. She received her master's degree in education from the Stanford Graduate School of Education in 2014.
Number of sources used in this article: . You will find a list of them at the bottom of the page.
It is not always easy for teachers and parents to turn learning into an interesting activity for a child. If traditional teaching methods don't work, get creative with your class. Use personalized, imaginative, and technologically advanced teaching methods to engage students.
Steps
Personal interests
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Create opportunities for hands-on learning. Children remember information better when their hands and brain are busy at the same time. Plan classes so that students have to talk, listen and move. Such lessons will be useful for active students with auditory and visual types of perception.
Encourage students to use their imagination. There is no need to limit and control their imagination. Give them complete freedom. Develop creativity with lessons that include creative activities and needlework, role-playing games and other similar activities.
- When studying the judicial system, offer to conduct a mock trial.
- As the children explore historical figures, have them dress up as the subject of the talk.
- Allow children to freely express themselves in a variety of ways. Suggest options individual projects to choose from. So, in a history lesson, you can write an essay, draw a picture, or prepare a reconstruction of an event.
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Use educational games. After a lesson or study of a concept with a child, offer a game that will test the acquired knowledge.
Practice abstract concepts. During the training, children get acquainted with a large number of abstract concepts that seem to them divorced from real life. Each lesson should include explanations of how such concepts can be used by people in everyday situations.
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Watch and listen to educational programs. Educators and parents can supplement their explanations and reading materials with educational videos, podcasts, or dramas. Audiovisual materials will interest even those who are not too attentive in the lessons.
- Watch and listen with the children to materials on the topic of the lesson.
- As a reward for reading a monumental work of art, organize a joint trip to theatrical performance based on the book.
Consider the specific interests of students. This approach will allow you to captivate your students and interest in knowledge.
Plan your learning time around the needs of your children. It is irresponsible to assume that all children learn in the same way and at the same pace. Parents and educators should assess the needs of each child. It may be difficult for him to sit still. Determine the best way to learn - is it an auditory, visual or kinesthetic approach? Use this information to plan your classes and lessons more accurately.
Let students teach each other. When a child takes responsibility for his own learning and teaches others, he strives to understand the material as well as possible.
Participate in the learning process. Join students or children when they are doing their homework. If you actively participate in the learning process, children will begin to repeat your habits and acquire problem-solving skills, as well as share your joy in learning new facts. If the child suspects that you are not interested, then he will consider that the activity is not worth his attention at all.
Availability and relevance
Games and technology
Assign digital projects. Today's children are born in the digital age. They are crazy about technology and confidently use technology. Put these skills to good use through themed activities.
Use technology in the classroom. Parents and educators can increase interest in learning with digital devices.
Does your child despair when faced with the first difficulty, inattentive, not trying? Teachers and psychologists confirm that today's children are losing interest in learning earlier. Parents are in a panic. According to polls by the Levada Center, 49% of Russians call schoolchildren's lack of interest in learning the most serious problem in the education system. At the same time, 28% of us would like to instill in our children the desire for knowledge, and 59% are sure that good schooling is necessary for a successful future career.
The parents themselves may have studied in Soviet schools and were more disciplined students, but they were hardly more eager to learn than their children. It was just easier to manage them: “It must be so.”
What has changed today? The rigid discipline was gone and the lack of interest in learning became more evident. In addition, the rhythm of life has accelerated. To involve the student in the learning process, more individual, practical tasks related to everyday life are needed.
Every child has a developmental need. All children are inquisitive, but we, adults, rather do not encourage their curiosity, as well as independence. And interest in learning is directly related to how much the student feels responsible for himself.
“The influence of parents is indirect, we cannot force the child to be interested,” insists psychologist Tamara Gordeeva, author of the book “Psychology of Achievement Motivation,” but it is we who can “start” intellectual activity, offering him something that captivates us ourselves.
Most schools do not set themselves the task of making it interesting for children to study
The situation is complicated by the influence modern culture A: today it is assumed that pleasure, success should follow instantly. It turns out that parents give their children a contradictory attitude - they encourage the immediate satisfaction of any desires, but require perseverance. “Only by directing the interest of the child, taking into account his individual characteristics, you can change the situation,” Tamara Gordeeva is sure.
“Motivate with a future result, the opportunity to enter a university, get Good work only high school students are allowed, - clarifies the family psychologist Lyudmila Petranovskaya. “To captivate those who have just come to school, it is possible only by the very process of learning.” But most schools, alas, do not set themselves the task of making it interesting for children to learn. This means that we, parents, have to develop a taste for participation in the school life of the child.
“Becoming a tutor in all subjects is not a way out,” says child psychologist Elena Morozova. “After all, no one can remain impartial in relation to their own child: emotions and reasons from the unconscious interfere with maintaining equanimity.”
What does it take to motivate a child?
- Interest and meaning to learn: he needs to feel the pleasure of what he is doing, and understand why he is doing it.
- The ability to set goals and achieve them, that is, to plan, concentrate, control their actions.
- Belief in yourself, understanding that success depends on yourself.
- Perseverance in overcoming difficulties, determination to bring what has been started to the end.
Tasks for parents
We asked experts to talk about universal recommendations that everyone can use, adjusting them to suit their nature and family traditions. Every age has its own priorities. Therefore, we have identified three main stages.
Elementary School: Safety and Curiosity
Children come to the first grade with the expectation of new, interesting events. But it is the first years of study that some of us later remember as the most boring. What can parents do to keep their child interested in learning? Answers in the article Primary School: security and curiosity
Secondary school: autonomy and encouragement
Rapid growth and hormonal storms change the way you perceive yourself and your relationships with others. This revolution in the life of a teenager is reflected in their studies. A hobby modern technologies, new forms of communication and leisure becomes another cause of conflicts with parents. How to communicate with a teenager to maintain interest in learning, read the article Secondary school: autonomy and encouragement
Senior classes: flexibility and endurance
The life of a high school student is marked by the need to choose a university and pass the exam. On the threshold of the future, the support of his parents is invaluable for him. How to help your child see their strengths, understand desires and prioritize, read the article Senior classes: flexibility and endurance