Why don't I want to live. I do not want to live and what to do with it? Where to find a new stimulus, a new dream, a new motivation for your own life

In life, sometimes there come such moments, days and years, when the whole world seems gray and rainy, favorite things do not please, and the meaning, long lost, is not sought in any way. This happens for various reasons: turmoil, death of loved ones, broken relationships, illness, psychological disorders. You can cope if you find the strength to live and overcome depression.

Why don't you want to live?

To force yourself to live when you don't feel like it, you first need to find out why do not want to live. The reasons may be different:

  • Tragedy in the family, loss of a close relative, friend;
  • Unsuccessful relationships, broken at the peak of emotions;
  • Physical and moral overwork due to work, responsible affairs, life circumstances;
  • Health problems;
  • financial problems;
  • The negative impact of the social circle;
  • Prolonged depression of a clinical nature;
  • Violence of a physical, sexual, moral nature;
  • Transitional age, teenage crisis;
  • Retirement and loss of purpose in life;
  • Pressure from society for non-compliance with generally accepted standards;
  • Loneliness.

Whatever the cause, it is important to find it out in order to deal with the problem. It is better to do this with the help of a specialist - a psychologist or psychotherapist. The reason lies deep, it is difficult to dig out on your own.

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At the same time, it’s not worth it to understand the past and procrastinate your own and other people’s mistakes every second. This makes sense at the stage of finding out the cause and planning work to eliminate it, but then it is better to stop digging into the past. At this time, the only way out is to accept the situation as it is.

How to find the desire to live in yourself?

If you are trying to figure out how to find the will to live, you have definitely begun to have a desire to pull yourself together and start living to the fullest. People who do not want to live do not think at all about how to change the situation: they either sit idly by, because they are afraid of death, or they are looking for it in every possible way.

Those who are anxious about their condition and want to get rid of it look for ways to change the situation, read psychological books, seek help from psychologists and work on themselves.

It all starts small - with the search for a desire to live. Few people think, but the desire to find the desire to live, despite the tautology, is the motivation to live. If it exists, then a huge step forward has already been taken and all that remains is to help yourself with any accessible way of those recommended by psychologists.

Tips and ways to regain the stimulus to life:

  • Get rid of bad memories contacting a psychologist or psychotherapist. Having lost faith in people, it is difficult to learn to trust them again, but letting go of destructive thoughts is vital. After all, it is impossible to pour fresh and hot tea into a cup full of cooled tea - so with the soul, as long as it is full of negative emotions, positive ones cannot gain a foothold in it.
  • Try to live one day. Psychologists recommend this method as one of the most effective. Do not think about tomorrow, do not think a year ahead, change strategy for tactics. Rejoice in the small victories of the day and decide what you will do with the advent of a new one: walk in the park after work, take selfies, feed the ducks in the pond, eat ice cream or go shopping for a new beautiful coat. This is enough to remember that life is beautiful.
  • Get a pet. A man needs a man, but furry or feathered friend replace him and become a personal psychologist. Taking care of him and pleasant sensations when a pet caresses your hand will help you forget about problems and realize that there is someone nearby who you care about.
  • Change your image. The advice is banal, but working. The time has come for external changes in order to bring about internal changes. Change your haircut, hair color, men can let go or shave off their beard. Change your wardrobe. It will not get worse, but new things will bring new sensations and people around will notice it. So you can perceive life in a new way and discover its new facets.
  • Make a change in the house. Repaint the walls, add decorations and beautiful posters or paintings, throw out the old and unnecessary, start making decorations with your own hands. It is natural for a person to get used to the environment, and a place where he spends a lot of time in a dejected state will inevitably return him back to despondency. Change the environment and some of the negativity will go away with it.
  • Get into something new. Change your social circle, go in for sports, dancing, singing, art. Start writing a book, go to the theatre, find an interest club. Physical and intellectual stress will fill the empty space and displace thoughts of the bad, and the circle of new acquaintances will bring new impressions.
  • If you lack positivity, bring it to others. Yes, unexpected, but it really works. Find those in need of moral, material, etc. help. Donated things, toys, time are valued by other people, and the positive received in gratitude will help you feel useful and needed. Doing good in order to get it back is a common advice from psychologists.
  • Make a list of your desires and start fulfilling it. Even if it seems that right now you want absolutely nothing and dream of nothing, think about what you would not give up. And figure out how to do it. This will really distract you.
  • Take a vacation. Go on an excursion, hike, trip, to the sea. And let the whole world wait. In ten days you will look at it with different eyes and the problems will become easier.

In addition, there is a small list of what should never be done when the desire to live has disappeared. In particular, it is strictly forbidden to do the following:

  • In no case do not allow yourself to get used to alcohol. No drinking will bring long-term relief, and short-term will lead to addiction. In a state of intoxication, negative emotions are aggravated, negative character traits appear, and actions become unpredictable. In this state, you can earn a lot of problems and ruin relationships with everyone who could help.
  • Don't withdraw into yourself and push away people who are trying to help, especially when your social circle is big enough. It seems to you that you will be alone with yourself and it will become easier, but this is not so. On checking, it turns out that being alone has become even worse, and the people who were pushed away now do not want to come back.
  • Don't focus on feelings. You can’t think for a long time about the circumstances that led to the state of despondency, especially if this does not help yourself in any way.

How to overcome depression?

One of the reasons why you don't want to live can be depression. The most difficult course is, and the mild form of the disease is extremely difficult to calculate.

Definitely, in case of depression, consultation with a specialist is necessary, perhaps even medication (antidepressants).

After consultation and a detailed study of all aspects, the specialist will recommend:

  • Find out the cause of depression;
  • Work to get rid of the consequences;
  • Improve the quality of your life;
  • Change the circle of communication;
  • Do psychological exercises;
  • Change the diet, include herbal antidepressants in it: cocoa, chocolate, bananas, citrus fruits, coffee;
  • Take therapeutic herbal supplements based on St. John's wort, lemon balm, valerian, motherwort, hawthorn.
  • Concentrate on loved ones, if there is a child - surround him with care, thereby regaining the meaning of life.

When the result of two or three weeks of intensive work has not justified itself and the state of health has not improved, a repeated consultation with a doctor is needed. Perhaps the situation is more dangerous than it seems. However, behavioral errors are the most common cause of depression, so changing behavior should affect morale for the better.

How to help a person who does not want to live?

It’s scary to hear from a dear person “I’m tired of living” or even “I want to kill myself.” But even worse is not knowing what to do with it and how to help him.

Suicides occur because people suffering from severe mental pain do not feel that they can cope with it and there is no one to help them. Psychologists say that the decision to commit suicide is the only way, which they see in order to relieve this tension.

A person is not always able to cope on his own, he may need the help of specialists, but relatives and friends can give him first aid, supporting him when it is most needed.

Here are some actionable tips for those who want to help others:

  • Understand the cause and identify signs of suicidal tendencies. For no reason, people do not decide to commit suicide, and sometimes the problem that caused such a desire can be solved by a person nearby. Understanding the cause is the first step to preventing suicide.
  • Treat such an individual as a person. Do not allow yourself and other people to be skeptical about his problem, do not think that someone cannot do anything with himself, on the contrary, take it seriously. It is better to exaggerate than to regret later because they did not take it seriously.
  • Surround the person with care, but do not overdo it. A person who does not feel loved and needed by someone will not be able to cope with despair. Encouragement will help to penetrate into the soul of a person and help him to endure. But excessive guardianship of an almost violent nature can push him away.
  • Listen to him carefully. An individual suffering from depression needs to speak out, and since he talks about it with you, take this as a sign of the highest trust and listen to what he will say. Try to understand the cause and how to solve the problem. Be calm and attentive to him. You can say that you appreciate such frankness, because this requires a lot of willpower, so you add a little self-confidence to a person.
  • Don't rush with advice.. Feelings of loneliness and alienation prevent the individual from accepting rational recommendations. Do not put pressure on a person with your opinion, especially do not condemn, do not show aggression and do not try to convince.
  • Ask the right question. “I hope you don’t think about killing yourself” doesn’t work because it requires you to wait for the answer you want. "No in this case will not help solve the crisis, "Yes" - you are unlikely to be told. A better question is: "Are you thinking about suicide?" This question will not cause such a thought in a person if he has not thought about it before, but it will help if a person has thought about it. Thus, he will find an understanding interlocutor nearby, who is not indifferent to his experiences and will be able to discuss a topic that others avoid.
  • Do not comfort in banal ways. “Everyone lives like this”, “Everything will be fine”, “You can do it, I believe in you” - leave it out. Hearing a couple of banal consolations, a person will lose confidence in you. Do not minimize suffering and do not humiliate feelings. Show understanding and responsibility.
  • Be constructive. Don't say, "Think of how we'll be hurt." Offer alternative solutions, ask if he sees other ways. Find out what is still positive for him and what he appreciates, notice when his mood changes and look for an alternative to suicide.
  • Give grounded hope. Instead of an empty “Everything will be fine”, use real opportunities and convince him that the crisis is bypassed by using any reasonable methods to overcome it.

You can advise endlessly, but people are different and what can be applied to one is absolutely not comparable to another. Everyone needs an individual approach.

  • Start a diary. Get your negative emotions out on paper, and then start remembering the good things. Describe your feelings. Decorate your entries as brightly as possible. Make various lists of things to do, movies, books, pleasant memories. This will help you understand yourself;
  • Keep a notepad with a list of achievements. On each page, write down things that you can be proud of, and at the moment when it will be bad, open and re-read to restore your faith in yourself;
  • Write morning pages. Especially relevant for creative people - morning pages, written in the morning with a cup of coffee almost immediately after waking up, help to free the mind and tune in the right positive way;
  • Photograph what makes you happy for 100 days in a row. Every day, choose a thing, event, place or person that brought you positive emotions that day. Save these photos and review them, or even better - print and create a photo album. If you do this regularly, then happiness will remain in life;
  • Set achievable goals. Break big goals down into milestones. Several small tasks are easier to complete than one huge one. For example, the goal “Get rid of depression” will be easier to achieve if you break it down into “Go to bed at night for 5 days in a row.” good mood” or “Have the most stormy weekend of my life”, etc.;
  • Build Habits. Psychologists say that it takes 27 days to develop a new habit or get rid of a bad one. During this time, the mind gets used to and merges with the new schedule. Draw a calendar and mark the completion of your desired habit or use one of the many tracker apps.

However, if no tips and methods help to find the desire to live, you need to seek help from a specialist.

If you are seriously wondering what to do if you do not want to live, then you are a great fellow.

No matter what problems you are fighting now, no matter how hopeless, dreary and meaningless each new day may seem - inside you are still alive and want with all your being.

It is possible and we are here to help you find your way back to a fulfilling life.

Let's talk about depression. What to do if everything is bad and you don’t want to live

For the Western world, a psychologist is a familiar and ordinary phenomenon. Almost everyone has their own therapist.

In the post-Soviet space, the situation is different: for some reason psychological problems considered frivolous and almost taboo.

Very often, even from relatives, you can hear advice like “Why are you stuck?

Get it together, it's still not so bad with you - over there, with Nadezhda Petrovna ... ". It is unlikely that anyone will tell a person with a broken leg to stop moaning in pain, referring to the fracture of some kind of Nadezhda Petrovna.

That is, everyone understands that everyone suffers from physical injuries in their own way.

Advice: do not drive such thoughts, considering them unacceptable. It is at this stage that the soul, which desperately wants to live a full life, can still be helped.

Sometimes psychological problems in the family or environment turn out to be so taboo and shameful that a person lives in a depressed state for years, attributing a breakdown and apathy to fatigue from work.

Masking the lack of desires with duties, the lack of a full-fledged sexual life - everyday problems.

And this can go on for a very, very long time, until an accomplished adult one day realizes that he has not felt happiness for a long time.

Many face real cognitive dissonance when they are trying to figure out what to do if they do not want to live, but there is a child for whom they are responsible.

Remember the main thing: there are no more or less significant causes of depression.

It can provoke:

  1. Death of a loved one
  2. The end of the relationship
  3. Ongoing unhealthy relationships
  4. Following other people's desires instead of your own
  5. Problems from childhood
  6. Chronic stress and overexertion at work
  7. Unloved job
  8. Changes in financial or social status
  9. Loss of stability in life or society, etc.

Please don't belittle your desperation with "everyone did it, why did I fall apart" arguments.

Each person has his own threshold of endurance and his own unique story that determines his - and only his - susceptibility to certain shocks.

Sometimes the push into the depths of depression is a minor event that in the normal state you might not notice - and this is normal.

While it sounds - your desire to return to a full life sounds.

5+ ways to bring yourself "to the light" and find the will to live

There are quite a few answers to the question of what to do if you feel very bad at heart and do not want to live.

Alas, there is no universal solution to the problem.

Depending on the person, the approach may be different, and it makes sense to choose those methods that are closer to you in terms of beliefs and usual, habitual way life.

It is very important not to force yourself, but to guide.

At the same time, please realize that it will take some effort on your part to get your life back on track - but you are not alone on this journey, and it is perfectly normal to accept help from others.

Don't be alone

During depression, it is very rare to want to see anyone.

But being completely alone, especially in those moments when thoughts of death visit you, is not the best solution.

Think about the people in your environment: who could support you without harming or imposing their presence around?

Try not to be alone with your thoughts

Ask a trusted friend or relative to stay with you for a while if you live alone.

On the other hand, if the depressed state is caused precisely by the people around you, find a way to live somewhere else for a while.

Tip: Don't feel guilty or ashamed. At peak moments, it is important to put yourself in order first of all, and remaining at the epicenter of the problem, you can make things worse for yourself and others.

Contact a psychologist

The help of a specialist will help to sort out the problem quickly and efficiently.

A good psychologist in the first few sessions is able to relieve the peak of tension and help to cope with the feeling of hopelessness, but during the course of treatment you will find the answer to the question of what to do if you don’t want to live.

Psychologist's advice is designed for long-term therapy, but its results are superior to all other methods.

Tip: It is important to find the specialist that is right for you. If after the first trial session you do not feel "contact" with a professional, try to go to another. You may have to try two or three psychologists before you find "the right one."

Of course, visiting a specialist costs money and often a lot.

If you can’t cope on your own, contact a psychologist

If the opportunity to give 50–70 c.u. a month to see a doctor you do not have, do not despair.

There are many free ways to get psychological help.

The presence of suicidal thoughts allows you to count on immediate help:

  1. Doctors of state psycho-neurological dispensaries
  2. Psychologists of volunteer social services
  3. Telephone helpline specialists

Any of them will help you quickly decide what to do if you don’t want to live, but it’s scary to die, and will also advise you on the best way to further action to combat depression.

Talk to someone

If there are people in your environment whom you completely trust and in whose reaction you are sure, talk to them frankly.

Sometimes the very opportunity to speak out already brings a little relief.

A reliable friend can both provide you with the support you need, and from situations that you did not notice.

Tip: If you know someone who has also battled (or still struggles with) depression, reach out to that person. Even practical advice you will not get, a frank conversation will show that there is a person who understands you not in words, but from his own experience. It helps.

Do yoga

Sport is considered the most powerful tool for producing hormones of happiness and stabilizing the state of the body.

But in depressive apathy, it is almost impossible to force yourself to go in for sports.

We believe in you with all our heart!

“I don’t want to endure these difficulties anymore and live with empty feelings from day to day,” - a personality crisis arises from such a thought. What do you do if you don't want to live? Crisis moments can completely turn the worldview of a person. Where does so much pessimism come from in us and how to find a way out? From a state of complete disappointment to the prime of life is just one step. Believe in change and let them in, and we will help you with this. Read to the end and you will find a way out of the dilemma of a lifetime.

Why does a person not want to live?

When you meet face to face with problems that did not bother you before, you begin to think about the worst. Colors gradually thicken when a person engages in self-deception. As if death will solve all the catastrophes that have accumulated over the years, it will also erase constant stress. Relatives and loved ones are not taken into account here, although all the pain of loss is transferred to them and injures their souls. A person, like a squirrel in a wheel, is constantly running away from and looking for excuses for his gloominess, instead of real action against this addiction.

If you don’t want to live, perhaps the person would just like to change circumstances, but she doesn’t have an inner core and. Suicidal thoughts consist of emptiness, which was formed from lost hope and unfulfilled desires. Negativity is an invisible force that gradually consumes the mind and makes it painful.

Why don't you want to live if a person has literally everything for ? Crisis situations can arise against the background of self-torture from day to day. Someone is familiar with work without days off on the verge of physical and moral capabilities. Someone goes to his cherished one, but he is constantly criticized and everything is done against him. Hands fall not only because of stupidity, disrespect for the outside world, but more because of inner weakness.

The feeling of disappointment, complete devastation pulls to the bottom, where the thoughts “I don’t want to live” begin to overcome on a subconscious level. The world is so material that thoughts about death often lead to a nervous breakdown and the most tragic ending. If the state has become habitual, this is an alarm of strategic importance. It is important to pull yourself together and conduct a deep analysis of the situation.

When you do not want to live, what to do?

If thoughts to make ends meet take the steering wheel over - you need to speak out to yourself or a loved one, because of what this arose. A person can stand on the edge precisely because he stubbornly kept inside and did not let them splash out. In a state of despair lies the key to finding the root cause of the conflict of life and death. Phrases such as “you just need to relax”, “go for a walk with friends” in 90% may not help. When the mood to commit suicide acquires planned actions, it is worth following these recommendations.

1. Don't focus on the negative.

How to stop obsessing over problems and? There will always be people and circumstances that will put spokes in the wheels. , problems in raising a child, failures in personal life, stress over trifles - all this simply erases vital energy. It is important to periodically release thoughts from obsessions. It is worth looking at yourself and your "aggressor" as if from the outside.

If you survive this situation in advance, without entering into it and not allowing it to approach you, you can learn to bypass it. Why not switch to something positive? Frequent with relatives and a child arise from scratch? Why not get together tonight for dinner and have a good time. Feeling money problems? It is worth not attaching strong importance to this and try to calmly find a decent job.

2. Look at things more broadly.

Why don't you want to live? Many are constantly in their "flask", which is gradually filled, clogged with a lot of rubbish. It is important to drive depression with a broom, because it is born due to a feeling of alienation from the outside world. The philosophy of life does not end with just home, work and a rare trip to a cafe with friends. It is important not to attract loneliness to yourself, but to become necessary for worthy people.

If it so happened that there is no partner, then you can get a pet. It's great for relieving stress and making you feel good. It is important to become necessary for someone and strives not to stand still. The “do not want to live” syndrome arises due to the lack of a reliable interlocutor who wants to express feelings, sincerely cry, waiting for support. It is worth expanding your social circle and finding people who are really interesting to you.

3. Get recognized.

4. Find an activity to your liking.

Let's be honest, what many do does not bring them moral satisfaction at all. We are constantly working famous phrase says: "Work ennobles." When you go to the office for years, where there is a tense atmosphere - why not find employment to your liking? It is important to dare to change the usual thing for something that will bring joy. Sometimes prestige, a big salary, a position can make you unhappy.

5. Do charity work.

Kindness is the real power that is given to everyone. What if you don't want to live? To give sincere help to those who truly need it. You can’t live only for yourself, your beloved, get hung up on your person. There is something you can only help when the birds sing in your soul and everything is fine. Just, noble deeds will help melt the ice of depression. The thought of helping someone should come from the heart, and not “it’s necessary, I was told from this article.” The secret of selfishness is also hidden in man's fear of attracting failure. When things begin to improve, many do not even look in the direction of a poor, sick person.

There is a superstition that his fate will pass on the shoulders of the "assistant". Isn't it stupid? expressed even in the most ordinary advice. A friend is constantly crying, how does her husband not respect her? It is worth reassuring her, supporting her, showing how much you appreciate her. The inner "worm", which harbors anger at the whole world, should not lead the mind. Giving away a part of ourselves, we automatically attract positive changes.

6. Fill life with love.

“I don’t want to live, because no one loves me,” - you don’t need to cry from such words, but you should draw a conclusion. For love to knock on the door, it is important to fill it every day. Love is expressed not only to beautiful girl or a guy, this is still a contemplation of nature, gratitude for what we have.

You need to find a business that will become a place for a person for. In creativity, light feelings are born, from which we are transformed. Have an affinity for dancing? Great, it’s worth signing up for courses and, maybe, finding an interesting interlocutor there. Want to start a relationship after a long break? There are meetings of interest where partners find each other. It is important to be open to everything around and there will definitely not be a feeling of a “squeezed lemon”.

If you don’t want to live, you must never play along with this feeling. Time is a sacred resource that is given to us for a reason. To collect yourself piece by piece, you need to learn to control thoughts, directing them in the right direction. You will definitely not follow all the recommendations, but you will certainly be able to overcome life's trials. Appreciate yourself, explore the beautiful and amazing sides of the world today.

If a person has a question about what to do, if he does not want to live, then he is a strong and strong-willed person. The willingness to do something is the right and wise decision, because in fact, under the desire to kill yourself, there is a desire to “kill” the problems that have piled up and the helplessness caused by them. The main thing now is to remember that there is always a way out, you just need to find your own. Useful and practical advice will help you become a psychologist for a while.

1. Find the root of the problem.

The thought of what to do if you do not want to live cannot be ignored, since the path from the moment of the first such sensations to the deep and the point of no return can be very short. You need to try to find the causes of the dejected state by analyzing what happened.

Some problems are on the surface while others, on the contrary, must be sought in the depths of the soul. All items must be written on a piece of paper, highlighting the main and secondary ones. The process of determining the causes of such a state helps to “systematize” thoughts a little in the head, understanding oneself.

More than 90% of the surveyed people who survived after an unsuccessful suicide attempt, claim that they were prompted to such an act by a pile of unresolved problems. Having identified the root of the problems, it will become much easier to find ways to solve them, especially with.

2. Transformation into a director.

The ending of an action movie depends in most cases on the director, who decides what happens to the main character. Reincarnation in it will help to get out of the feeling of being driven into a corner for a while. They say that it is always easier to give advice from the outside.

If a folk wisdom use in practice, you can imagine that your own lived life is a film and someone else's story. At the same time, it is important to answer the questions: “What does the hero need to do in order to want to live?”, “What is better to avoid now?”, “ What can affect the situation

As a director, you should return to the list of identified problems by writing a sentence next to each item on how you can get out of the impasse and never again ask yourself what to do if I don’t want to live.

3. Look around.

They say that everything is known in comparison. Indeed, many have been able to arrange life in the best possible way, but there are those who struggle with personal tragedies, grief or illness every day. Perhaps, along with the problems of people deprived from birth, the reasons indicated in the list will at least partially lose their importance.

4. Loneliness - no.

6. "Play for joy."

The world learned about an unusual psychological game thanks to the American writer Eleanor Porter, the author of the work Pollyanna. Its main character is a young girl from a poor family, whom her father taught to "play for joy", that is, to find a reason for joy in any incident.

For example, having received crutches instead of a desired toy, Pollyanna was delighted with this gift, arguing that it was they she needed in the first place. Children's direct play helps to understand adult and complex problems.

7. In search of yourself.

Often, a reluctance to live arises among those who have been imposed by someone on behavior patterns or certain dogmas, which they had to follow for many years. Understanding that you do not correspond to some ideal kills your own strength. This state is depressing, evoking thoughts that you are not living your life.

A psychological crisis is a signal that a turning point is coming, which may be the start for a new hobby or finding a place where it really is.

The search for an answer to the question of what to do if you don’t feel like it leads to completely unexpected changes: a change in religious views, extreme sports, the adoption of one or another philosophy of life.

Finding yourself is a high indicator of personal development and invaluable life experience, and, as you know, there is no bad experience.

8. Nothing to lose.

The unwillingness to live sooner or later leads to thoughts of suicide. Then you need to act, making cardinal decisions. If you are tired of moving forward and everything around you, then why not try something that used to be below the line of “once”, “expensive”, “not for me” or “somehow later”? After all, by and large, there is nothing to lose.

9. Time heals.

People living on the coast of the Mediterranean Sea, when a storm hits, hide in shelter. Thus, they wait out the indignation of the elements. So it is desirable to act at critical moments, when a wave of despair sweeps over the head, sweeping away the foundations, the usual balance, vitality.

Time heals wounds, reminding us that life goes on. After a storm, the sun always comes out, pushing you to look at what awaits around the corner.

10. Take a closer look at family values.

Procreation and care for offspring for the majority becomes the law. However, is everyone happy with such a role? And is everyone aware of their true attitude to this topic? For those who are looking for their own, you can try to be imbued with these questions for a day or two. What can be done to feel whether the family is suitable for the main place:

  • spend the day in the orphanage, play with the kids, bring them small gifts;
  • get a job as a nanny, tutor, teacher or tutor. In some cases, you will need not so much education as desire and knowledge in some topic;
  • visit a friendly family;
  • to get a dog or a cat - caring for a living being, understanding responsibility can push you to make a more serious decision - the birth of a child;
  • visit parents, brothers, sisters, nephews, grandparents, other close relatives;
  • participate in a family action or attend classes to strengthen family ties.

However, this category includes not only the upbringing of children, the expectation of grandchildren. This also includes love. And sometimes this feeling is only enough for two. It is not necessary to give birth to a son or daughter in order to live happily with your partner. There are couples who have been in a civil marriage for decades, do not plan a child, enjoying each other's company. To understand if this meaning is appropriate, you can:

  • spend time, effort in search of a loved one;
  • spend more time with your soul mate;
  • make each other surprises, cause a smile;
  • to master life together;
  • dream of a joint future;
  • Discuss personal values ​​to avoid misunderstandings.

11. Learn to earn.

This item also includes two subcategories - career and wealth. To understand the first goal, it is better to try:

  • get a job where there are many competitors;
  • try yourself in different professions;
  • get your first major promotion;
  • get praise, encouragement from superiors;
  • make a tangible contribution to the development of your firm, company (win a competition, offer original idea, non-standard approach, etc.);
  • open own business, work for yourself.

Career race develops a good passion. So that it does not subside, one more trump card is required - money. But there is one caveat in this case: the desire to get an extra dollar can turn into greed. To eliminate such a risk, it is better to immediately come up with the use of every penny. For example, earn money for new clothes, holidays abroad, building a house, helping parents, etc.

The same applies to power and popularity. They are capable of turning the head, causing harm. Therefore, it is better to encourage these aspirations in yourself only if there is a sincere desire to lead people, help them, improve their lives.

12. Remember about self-realization.

How many people have lost their zest for life simply because they once abandoned what they loved. The reasons are different:

  • poor income;
  • condemnation, pressure from relatives or friends;
  • failure on the way to the goal, many obstacles;
  • fear of failure;
  • a race for false prestige;
  • self-sacrifice for the sake of the family, dear person.

In retrospect, such people often regret the decision they made, but do nothing about the situation. They do not take even the slightest step, because they consider the moment lost, age old, abilities small. However, these are just excuses. If an activity that once inspired or liked is constantly spinning in your head, why not try it now?

I want to be a dancer - you can enroll in a choreographic studio. There is a dream to become an artist - there are so many art schools in the world. As a child, there was a desire to travel a lot - it is never too late to think about such a thing. The main thing is determination and understanding that no money, obstacles or condemnation can be compared with the true happiness received from your favorite pastime.

13. Give the world good.

Caring for others, nature gives inspiration, lightness, warmth. This is why doing good deeds is just as important as family or career. How to understand your predisposition to the good:

  • sign up to volunteer;
  • organize or even establish a fund;
  • do small good deeds every day;
  • donate money periodically;
  • take an animal from a shelter, help an orphan find a new home;
  • pay for someone's purchases at the checkout in the market;
  • smile at a sad fellow traveler;
  • replenish the ranks of the medical staff;
  • give someone a free lift in a car;
  • unexpectedly play a romantic melody for a couple in love;
  • draw and present a picture for no reason;
  • pick up trash in a public park;
  • become a blood donor.

There are so many ways to help that it will last a lifetime. The list does not even show a millionth of all the possibilities. The smallest good is already changing the world, if not the earthly, then someone's inner one. The realization that one's own decisions make someone smile, or even save a life, warms the soul very much.

14. Master pleasure.

Hedonism is a system of ethical values ​​that puts pleasure above all else. Hedonists prefer to see in the moment they are living. They know how to appreciate every second of pleasure, they see in it the highest goal. How to come to such a worldview? Learn to enjoy

  • tasty food;
  • high works of art - paintings, music, theatrical or choreographic productions, cinema, etc .;
  • beauty in nature, in man, in work, in everything from the style of clothing to the structure of aircraft;
  • any kind of recreation;
  • freedom, independence;
  • feelings, short-term emotions, physical sensations;
  • success, achievement.

And these are just a few examples. Despite the slightly exaggerated concept, it can be well developed. Psychotherapists teach you to see the good in life and are able to help in this area.

15. Become a wrestler.

Wrestling is another exciter of excitement. Martial arts competitions are also included in this category, but more in terms of life fights. Overcoming difficulties, defending an idea, in-depth analysis of topics - all this can captivate for decades. How can you devote yourself to such a struggle:

  • start a business from scratch, establish, develop it from the very beginning;
  • trust in your favorite business, despite the obstacles;
  • attend a rally, become a part of it;
  • defend your point of view;
  • learn something difficult that others think is impossible;
  • surprise loved ones with their own success;
  • break the stereotype by example;
  • find an original way out of a difficult situation;
  • come up with a corona move, psychological method, an original way to solve any problem;
  • overcome your fear or even phobia.

Some individuals see meaning in the difficulties encountered. They are not interested in what comes easily. Fight for them is the meaning of all existence.

The sages say that the universe does not give more tests than a person can bear, so it is important to maintain faith in yourself and in your strengths. The acquisition of invaluable experience on how to live if you don’t feel like living, in the future will allow you to lend a helping hand to someone who finds himself in a similar situation and, perhaps, needs fateful advice.

Unfortunately, in the life of any person one day there may come a period when he realizes that he has completely lost interest in life. Such a state may be preceded by many troubles and upheavals. Sometimes unwillingness to live may even appear, at first glance, groundlessly. How to overcome this apathy?

Why you might want to die

Even if you believe that such a condition arose for no particular reason, this cannot be - there is most likely a reason, but you are trying to ignore it or simply do not suspect it. In the first case, it can be stress that happened some time ago: parting with a loved one, a change in occupation, illness (one's own or a close relative), some kind of conflict.

In the second case, we can talk about the disease. Visit an endocrinologist - problems with the thyroid gland can cause apathy and prolonged depression, and these troubles are often solved by a fairly simple method of treatment.

If there are good reasons for that - how to be

It is important to understand that almost any problem can be solved. Of course, there is something that cannot be solved, and, perhaps, this is only the death of a loved one. The pain of loss, unfortunately, can only be healed with time - everything else can be fixed.

debts

If you are in debt, find an additional source of income. You may have to change jobs or take on additional responsibilities. Also, in many cases, it will be useful to consult with a lawyer - he can advise you on how to get out of this situation. It is possible that debt restructuring will help you.

Disease

It is important to realize that millions of people daily learn that they are overcome by some kind of illness. This is no reason to give up! Start the fight for your health, read stories similar to yours on the Web that ended positively, and understand that in your case, with due perseverance, everything will end well. Consult a doctor, and in no case do not dwell on the opinion of one specialist - listen to different doctors. Make a plan to deal with the disease and strictly adhere to it. Subsequently, this story will make you more attentive to your health and better "understand" your body.

Non-reciprocal love

Almost always, people who have experienced unrequited love and suffer because of their unrequited feelings later realize that they have wasted time devoted to suffering. If a person does not love you, you need to do everything possible to cut him out of your life! Moreover, your main task now is to make your life bright and interesting and without an object of sympathy. Filling everyday life with interesting events and new positive impressions, you simply do not leave yourself time to think about unrequited love.

Subsequently, you will certainly meet a person with whom your feelings will be mutual, even if now you do not need anyone else. Then you will regret the time spent thinking about failed love. Believe that one day you will understand that this development of the situation was only for the better.

I do not want to live, or in other words, prolonged depression

What is it and how to overcome it

Protracted depression is called a psychological disorder, which is accompanied by some accompanying symptoms. These include apathy, severe physical weakness, bad mood and unwillingness to live. You are no longer interested in anything and you do not want anything - it seems that nothing can favorably affect your condition. If you do not start the fight against this disease in time, you can lose several years of your life!

Medical treatment

It is very difficult to cope with prolonged depression on your own - especially when you do not want to do it. it medical problem, and by visiting a psychologist, you can find out what treatment will help in your situation. The necessary psychotherapeutic help can completely bring you out of a depressive state. It is highly not recommended to buy antidepressants on your own and vary the dosages at your own discretion!

Self-treatment

If you have no desire to go to the doctors, but you want to live a different life, then you can help yourself. However, even the fact that you are reading this article, says that you are ready for self-healing.

First, you need to determine what caused the depression, and leave this situation in the past. You may come back to thoughts about her later, but now it's time to think about your psychological state.

1. The first step is to make drastic changes in your lifestyle. It may seem to you that you do not have the strength and ability to enter something else into your everyday life, but you still need to force yourself to do it. Unfortunately, at this stage there is no other way - only to force yourself.

Start with new experiences and go on some kind of trip. If you don't feel like going anywhere right now, buy a tour that you would want to go to when you weren't depressed. Bring more activity into your lifestyle - join the gym for classes with a trainer or go to group workouts. These two points will help you get started in the right direction. It is also important not to forget to observe the correct daily regimen and consume the required number of vitamins.

2. On the Web, you can find a lot of videos in which psychologists give free advice on how to get out of depression. Take the time to watch these videos and learn important information from them.

3. Share with a loved one (mother, husband or girlfriend) your experiences. Even close people do not always understand that their relative or friend is depressed, attributing his behavior to a bad mood. Meet and connect with the people you love more often.

4. Find a new hobby for yourself. If you are not interested in any activities now, then remember what you liked before or what you planned to do. Sign up for the selected master classes, and set yourself up to attend at least the first two classes - not one, but two! Most likely, the new business will captivate you, and allow you to significantly distract from your condition.

How to help a person who does not want to live

If you asked yourself such a question, then it is probably about a person who is of special importance to you. Many people who have fallen into such a difficult psychological state find it very difficult to get out of it on their own.

If you notice that someone close to you is depressed, you can help by:

  • People suffering from this disease, most often communicate little with others. It is often during this period that they lose many friends who failed to understand that their refusal to meet was not at all an indifferent attitude to friendship, but a difficult moral state. If you notice that such a person has signs of depression, do not pay attention to his desire to withdraw into himself and do not take his detachment personally. Take time to check in regularly about his affairs, find out about his mood, tell him about yourself and cheer him up. Even if others turn away from him, he will not feel the burden of loneliness, because he will know that he has someone who is always ready to listen and talk to him!
  • Suggest a trip to an interesting place. You must be sure that the route you choose will please this person. If he used to like visiting museums and exhibitions, go to a similar place. To make it simply inconvenient for him (or her) to refuse you, say that the tickets have already been bought, and you have no one else to go with, and you don’t want another company for yourself.
  • Let him (her) know that your friendship or family ties are very important to you. Ask for advice, show interest in his (her) affairs. A depressed person often claims that no one needs him - show that this is not so at all!
  • If you see that the situation is serious enough, convince the person suffering from depressive moods to visit a psychologist. Ask him at least once to go to a consultation with a specialist. Tell him that millions of people turn to professionals for help every day, and this only benefits them.
  • When communicating, emphasize that you are convinced of the temporality of this phenomenon. Periodically, your friend may have "enlightenment" in the state - tell him about it. Pay attention to situations that improve his mood, and try to repeat them.
  • Do not communicate with such a person as with a sick person and do not demonstrate "acted gaiety". A depressed woman or man understands everything, but is in apathy. Remain in your natural state, but show the person who shows in every possible way that he is tired of life how much you care about his cure.

How to want to live when you want to die

If it sometimes seems to you that there is no desire to continue living at all, then this does not mean at all that you are seriously suicidal. It only means that you are not living the life you would like to live. Accordingly, there is only one way out - to radically change your everyday life.

1. External changes

  • Start with a change in appearance. Since you feel an unwillingness to live, then, apparently, you are at least tired of your current image. Go to a trusted hairdresser and tell the stylist that you would like to change your hairstyle, but you are not sure which option to choose - a specialist will surely help you with a choice based on your type of appearance. Be prepared to not enjoy the first day the new kind, but this is only to your advantage - now you can think about something else besides not wanting to live. Most likely, the next day you will see all the delights of the new look. If this does not happen, go to another master, continuing the experiments.
  • Also review your wardrobe. If it is not possible to use the services of a stylist, then ask a friend with good taste for advice. If these options do not suit you, then just find fashion bloggers on Instagram or in VK groups, and copy the style of those who you like. It is important that you do not dress like this before.

2. Set goals

Surely in recent times there have been few changes, achievements or new experiences in your life. You have the option to change this. Don't make big plans if you're barely able to get out of bed right now, but taking small steps forward can still help. Start small - go for a walk in the park, go to the movies, etc.

3. Communication

Try to communicate with positive and kind people from which you seem to be "charged" with positive energy. And in general, for all your reluctance, you should make regular efforts to maintain your social activity. Don't focus on your mood - instead call a friend and see how she's doing. Pay a visit to a loved one. Try at least a few times a week to initiate contact with the people you love.

4. Pet

Now you are completely immersed in the current state, so you should switch from your personality to something else. Get a pet that will need your attention - a puppy or a kitten. Remember what animal you dreamed of before and buy it or adopt it now. Caring for a new friend will distract you from your own worries. You will be able to feel your need and give yourself many joyful moments. Many depressed people find it difficult to communicate even with their families, but they notice an improvement in their mood after contact with animals.

5. Movies

On the Web, you can find many sites that provide lists and descriptions of motivational films. Why don't you review at least some of them? On the example of someone else's story, you will learn how life can change for the better.

6. healthy image life

Perhaps, in an attempt to escape from depression, you began to use alcohol or drugs, thereby providing yourself with a new problem. Each use of alcohol or illegal drugs only aggravates your situation, and now your main task is to eliminate this aspect of your life!

7. Sports

It is difficult for many to believe this, but doing this method really improves not only physical health, but also normalizes the psychological background. Buy a gym membership for personal training with a trainer or group fitness classes, and after some period of training, you will notice a major change in your life.

Where to find a new stimulus, a new dream, a new motivation for your own life

Dreams. Learn to follow important rule- turn your dreams into goals, the fulfillment of which is given a certain period of time. Surely, as a child, you dreamed a lot, planning that you would realize all this "as soon as you grow up." How many of these dreams have come true? It seems that you have come a period when your life just needs a change! Remember where you dreamed of going, what purchase you planned, and the like. Now all this is your plans for the near future. Write a wish list and start making it a reality.

Motivation. How to motivate yourself to any changes or implementation of plans. Clearly imagine what your life will be like when you do what you want but don't have the strength or determination to do. Think in detail how much you need it and what it can give you. Still not able to motivate yourself? Perhaps, in fact, you no longer need what you once dreamed of and that is why your motivation is so weak? Review your dream list and determine what you really want from life in the future.

Leave fear behind. We will be separated from many accomplishments and changes by the fear of judgment, pain, criticism, and the like. Your fears are what's stopping you from living a good life. If you want to achieve really high goals, then you have to understand that failure in this case is a natural phenomenon.

If you are afraid of something on the way to what you want, then analyze the situation well. Accept that your fears may not be unfounded, and you will indeed have to go through some unpleasant moments, but they are what separate you from what you really need! And when you get this, then all the uncomfortable or difficult situations that accompany this achievement will become small and insignificant for you. Give your dream a chance to come true!