Sometimes it becomes interesting to me how certain “folk phrases” appeared, which roam in many different pseudo-philosophical groups like “Fuck normality” in contact.
There are two phrases that most irritate me - this is "every exception confirms the rule" and "rules are there to be broken." First of all, they annoy me with their utter stupidity and complete illogicality, but, nevertheless, for the most part, they are spreading on the Internet in this form under the heading “age-old wisdom”, they are screwed into all sorts of discussions as a decisive argument - in general, the utter abomination.
The first sentence was easy enough. Her roots are legal, she has nothing to do with normal life. I had to tinker with the second, but thanks to the cute Ever and its source was discovered, this time purely literary.
Let's start with the exception, which, as you know, proves the rule. This expression was formed as a paraphrase from Cicero's speech in defense of Lucius Cornelius Balbus the Elder. He was accused of having received Roman citizenship illegally. The case was heard in 56 BC. e.
L. Cornelius Balbus was a native of Hades (the modern name of Cadiz), served under Pompey, with whom he became friends and was friendly; Pompey and was the sponsor of his citizenship. The background of the accusation was, as in most high-profile cases of that time, political. Although Balbus himself was politically active, the blow was certainly aimed at the triumvirs of the First Triumvirate (Caesar, Crassus and Pompey).
Balbus was defended not only by Cicero, but also by Pompey and Crassus. The case was won. Balbus always tried to pursue a pacifying policy, to find common place between enemies. He became the first naturalized (not born) citizen to become consul in Roman history, in 40 BC. e.
In his speech, Cicero makes this argument. In some interstate agreements on the mutual recognition of Rome with neighboring countries, there was a clause explicitly excluding dual citizenship: residents of those countries could not become Roman citizens without first renouncing their own. Balba's citizenship was dual; this was the formal side of the accusation. Cicero says that since there is such an exception in some agreements, those agreements in which it is not subject to the opposite rule, namely, allow dual citizenship.
In other words, if there is an exception, then there must be a rule from which that exception is made, even if that rule was never explicitly stated. Thus, the existence of exceptions confirms the existence of the rule from which these exceptions are made.
Thus, the original phrase is nothing more than a legal incident applied in defense of a person 2000 years ago.
The second phrase - rules exist to be broken - alas, there is no such rich history. Its source is young, and the author died only half a century ago, so we can say that the phrase is, in a sense, our age. The ancestor of the main wisdom of all idiots is the esteemed Erich Maria Remarque, who in his book Drei Kameraden (“Three Comrades”) put the following phrase into the mouth of his hero Gottfried Lenz:
Prinzipien muß man durchbrechen, sonst machen sie keine Freude.
What does it mean in translation:
It is sometimes necessary to deviate from principles, otherwise they do not bring joy.
“Broken phone” made the original phrase almost unrecognizable, and, of course, completely distorted its meaning.
In order to get out of poverty, it is not enough just to “do something” or “work somewhere”. This is just the path to poverty and further into poverty!
And to become rich, you need to start following these simple rules:
Each of your problems should be solved in as soon as possible, then it usually takes the least amount of effort to solve the problem. Be decisive! Think less and do more!
1. Work less for someone else. The more you work, the worse you live! Work - from the word slave!
2. If you are going to have money, bring some value to the market and people will bring you money. But the amount of money depends on how convincingly you describe the benefits of this value!
3. Work only for your own interest. Forget the calls corporate culture and company loyalty. The company always profits from you, otherwise you would not work there.
4. Think about how to earn at least $50,000 per month. Can be more. Can't be less!
Money comes to you through other people. Communicate! Unsociable and beeches extremely rarely become rich.
5. A poor environment almost always pulls you into poverty. Even very rich people will always have “relatives, friends and other petitioners” who, if you do not professionally fight them off, will quickly deprive you of money. If you are still a poor person, people in your environment simply do not like, do not respect, and some even hate the rich. You should always communicate with Winners and Optimists. That's right, with a capital letter - Winners and Optimists!
6. Poverty arises when you shirk responsibility!
7. If you have little money, you need to do business. If there is no money at all, you need to do business urgently, right now! Look for problems and think of ways to solve them. Draw up the most successful solutions in the form of business projects and offer them to investors.
8. The path to great wealth lies only through passive income! Income that comes to you regardless of your efforts. Create a source passive income and live to your heart's content!
9. There are only two rules for profitable investment. First, save money! Rule two - if you want to take a risk, see rule one.
10. Income must always exceed expenses.
Explore the biographies and thoughts of the richest people in the world. You can start with Bodo Schaefer's Money or the ABC of Money.
11. Answer yourself the questions “Who am I? What is my uniqueness? What is the meaning of my life? What would I do (do) if there was no money? Just be honest! Strength, energy, passion from the answers to these questions, from the realization of the meaning of one's own life- simply omnipotent!
12. Dreams are the main thing in your Life! Dream and believe that dreams will come true! A person begins to die when he stops dreaming.
13. Help people! Not for money, from the bottom of my heart! But! Only those people whom you want to help yourself. They don't have to be relatives or friends.
14. Give compliments! Just praise a woman on the street for a beautiful hairstyle, a man for a beautiful, athletic figure, and you never know more reasons for praise. It always raises your self-esteem!
15. Keep a daily log of your victories! Insults and defeats are remembered 7-12 times longer than victories and successes. If you are discouraged, read this magazine!
16. With any enemy, and poverty is the enemy of any person, you need to fight to the end, without pity for the enemy and pity for yourself!
17. And the last advice. Never, never, never give up.
The list was prepared by the Russian Club company.
We are all hostages of the conventions and rules established in society. As they say, life is a game, and people in it are actors. What happens in movies when actors deviate from the script? That's right, complete chaos. So it is in real life. Rules are a kind of general scenario of life, or, as psychologists say, a muscular skeleton human relations. Rules traffic, rules of conduct, rules of writing, safety rules, rules of the game, etc., you can list indefinitely. If you think about it, it becomes scary: how can you learn such great amount rules?! But living by the rules does not mean breaking your character for the sake of society. In fact, we follow most of the rules on full automatism, because we are so used to it from childhood.
But with the birth of a child, newly-born parents for some reason begin to deviate from the usual rules, adjusting to the baby. Now their whole life revolves around this charming lump. We close the sockets so that the child does not climb into them, we equip the apartment with a bunch of all kinds of security equipment, we change the usual daily routine ... As a result, the child grows in greenhouse conditions, like a rare flower, over which everyone around jumps and from which dust particles blow off. Often parents give the child complete freedom. If you want - eat, if you want - don't eat, if you want - sleep, if you want - don't sleep, if you want - go to Kindergarten, if you want - stay at home, if you want - clean your room, if you don't want - don't... But absolute freedom sometimes turns into the absence of any guidelines. And at one point, the parents catch on and realize that the baby is already big enough, and it's time to accustom him to adult life by the rules. Thus begins the era of all kinds of prohibitions, punishments and reproaches. The kid has already managed to get used to the complete absence of any rules and does not want to follow them at all.
Children are shaped by habits
A child who is just learning about the world needs rules, like a compass and a map for a tourist wandering in the wilds. He will have to live in this very society, which means that it is necessary to learn the laws by which this very society lives. Happy is he who knows how to live by the rules. It is easier for such a person to join any team, learn and limit himself in anything to achieve the goal. As they say, children are formed by habits. After all, we follow most of the rules out of habit, without thinking about how to act in a given situation. And the task of parents is from the very early age develop healthy habits in your child. Psychologists identify four main whales that lay the script for a child's future life.
A clear daily routine - the beginning of the beginning
The child needs a certain daily routine: get up, wash, get dressed, have breakfast, brush his teeth, etc. A clear sequence and repetition of habitual actions instill confidence in the child, create a sense of reliability, security, contribute to good mood. The order is necessary for the correct development and subsequent study at school. In the absence of a regimen, it will be difficult for a child to accustom himself to being organized, he will not be able to concentrate on one subject, because. his attention is scattered and not accustomed to clear frames. Of course, the daily routine is a rather individual concept, but it must be observed constantly, that is, the child must sleep, wake up and eat at the same time every day. As a rule, children themselves set this schedule, and parents only need to stick to it. In the future, the habit of external organization is a step towards internal organization. A child who lives according to the regime puts his toys back in place, helps his mother put things in order in the room, and having matured, he can easily learn to put on the shelves and distribute the information received, separating the necessary from the unnecessary, and systematize his thoughts. And this, you see, helps a lot in adulthood.
Highly important example to follow
The parental example plays a fundamental role in the education of the rules of behavior. The child automatically learns the rules accepted in the family. It is in the family, at the common table, that the child develops (or does not develop) good manners. So before making comments to a three-year-old toddler, look at yourself. If dad does not thank mom for dinner or does not wash his hands before eating, then you should not expect a different behavior from the child. Children quickly adopt the behavior of adults: if parents speak with their mouths full, sit, lounging, put their elbows on the table or eat with their hands, then it is hardly possible to demand a different behavior from the baby. At the table, absolutely everything matters: not only what we eat, but also how we do it. Parents should not allow (neither themselves nor others) that during meals the TV is on, the radio is blaring, someone is reading the newspaper or talking on the phone. The child is a mirror image of the parents. And the task of parents is to behave as they require from their child.
Group games by rules
At about 2-3 years old, the child begins to play with peers. This is very milestone in the development of personality. Often offer children role-playing and group games, where there are certain rules. Explain to the child that each game has its own rules, for example, in football players cannot take the ball in their hands (except for the goalkeeper), and in volleyball you cannot play with your feet. Having learned to follow the rules in the game, the child gradually transfers this behavior model into real life. More difficult than others to obey the established rules are kids with a strong character (clear leaders), who have their own opinion on any occasion. In games, take such children different roles: today you will be a seller, and tomorrow you will be a buyer, etc. The child must understand that it is impossible to play only those roles that he likes all his life.
The tale is a lie, but there is a hint in it
Fairy tales, or rather, their analysis, help to form rules related to the sphere of human relations and ethics of behavior. It is from books that a child learns what is good and what is bad. For example, when reading a fairy tale about Little Red Riding Hood, note that she did very well when she agreed to take a pie and a pot of butter to an old grandmother (the elderly must be taken care of), but she did badly that she told the wolf where she was going (you can’t talk to strangers ). After reading the fairy tale, be sure to discuss with the baby which of the heroes did well, which did badly, why they did it, how to behave in this situation, etc. When a child learns to analyze actions fairytale heroes, it will be easier for him to analyze his actions and accept the right decision. Compare fairy-tale characters with real heroes. You can come up with a fairy tale yourself that will reflect the problems of your child (for example, about a greedy bunny who did not want to share a carrot with anyone).
Explanation for understanding
There should be few rules, but they should be clearly formulated and understandable to the baby. You can’t dump a bunch of prohibitions and restrictions on a child in one day. Gradually introduce new concepts. The first rules can be dressed up in the form of poems and songs, for example, "When I eat, I am deaf and dumb." Such jokes, unlike strict prohibitions, do not arouse in the child a feeling of protest and a desire to do the opposite. But, repeating from time to time, they are deposited in the mind of the child as irrefutable truths. You can not, setting the rules, constantly humiliate the baby. The phrases "Immediately!", "Did you hear what I said?", "Come here quickly!" cause the child to protest and the desire to go to conflict. Rules should be pronounced firmly, but not in a rude manner. Even if the baby does bad things, parents should respect him. Only on mutual respect can a compromise be reached.
When setting rules, be sure to explain them. Often, when answering a question from a small child, we get off with the phrases "It's not supposed to be like this", "It's necessary to do it this way", etc. The child must know why it is impossible and what will happen if he suddenly violates the parental prohibition. If the baby, not paying attention to your prohibitions, climbs to the burning burner or tries to touch the included iron, do not beat him on the hands. Better let him touch the "dangerous" object once, of course, under your supervision. Personal experience(especially unpleasant) often turns out to be much more effective than endless parental shouts and slaps. In addition, it is likely that the child will decide to violate your prohibition when no one is watching, and then this can end very sadly. Not understanding what will happen if he breaks the rules, the child will not be able to consciously follow them. Try to use the word "no" as little as possible, only in cases where the prohibition concerns the safety of the baby. The less often the word “no” sounds, the more effective it is.
And most importantly, when setting rules for your child, be unambiguous. The established prohibitions cannot be derogated from. You can often observe a situation where mom or dad, being in good location spirit, they allow the child everything in the world, and the next day for the same actions they beat on the hands or put in a corner. How, tell me, the child then figure out what can and cannot be done? This also applies to other family members: if mom allows one thing, dad allows another, and grandmother allows a third, then it will be difficult for the child to figure out who, in fact, to listen to and whose rules to follow.
Rules are there to be broken
Of course, following the rules should not turn into the suppression of personality. Rules are not meant to be followed from time to time, but to be broken sometimes.
Try not to go too far so as not to become hostages of the established rules. It will be difficult for a child who lives according to strictly established laws to make independent decisions in the future, because he has always lived according to the rules established by someone. Feeding, sleeping and walking at the same time is, of course, good. But the kid must understand that sometimes the rules can be broken and nothing bad will happen. For example, on a weekend, on holidays, or when guests arrive. Just be sure to explain to your child that this is a one-time action in honor of the holiday, and tomorrow you will return to your usual daily routine again. You need to let yourself feel the taste of independence gradually, in small sips, as if you are drinking hot tea: if you take too large a sip, you can get burned badly, and the taste of tea is not so noticeable, and when you take small sips, you feel the whole aroma of tea and at the same time get burned. With skillful dosing of independence, the child feels all the delights of "adult" life and learns to bypass the pitfalls.
It was an introductory lecture, thanks to which we were able to understand how strong our desire for the goal is, despite all the difficulties that Dmitry Vadimovich talked about so much. But creative people are fearless people. And of course, a person who is in love with his work talks about it in such a way that it is simply impossible not to fall in love with it yourself.
If the first master class was held in a romantically inspired atmosphere, then the second part, held on November 6, was devoted to technical side screenwriter's work. Special attention was given to the basic rules and laws, according to which even the most unusual scenarios are written.
“Rules are meant to be broken,” you say. But we can't break a rule before we know it. Dmitry Kostromenko is a person with amazingly developed imaginative thinking, which, of course, is a very useful quality for a screenwriter. At his master classes, we often hear interesting comparisons, examples and associations. For example, he compared the professional "savvy" of the screenwriter with ... a street fight. “If one more experienced fighter, who was tortured in training, was taught to control his body, and he received these skills, meets with the one who can “call in” with the maximum swing, this fight will end in a second and a half.”
Of course, basic knowledge about the structure of dramaturgy is nothing more than props that do not let you fall, but also add advantages over the same creative person as you, but who does not own this knowledge.
"Believe your eyes." The error is immediately visible when what is happening on the screen is uncomfortable for the eye. The only exceptions are those moments where we want to play with the subconscious of the viewer, using unusual visual effects. But whether the audience will like it is another question.
"Feel, display, invent, apply, create." This is what dramaturgy is about. It would seem that everything is simple for the screenwriter - we describe everything that happens on the screen, and we get the script. But difficulties always arise, and it is not easy to achieve exactly the goal that we set ourselves at the very beginning of our work. Dmitry Kostromenko told us about the importance of structuring the script, the basic rules and little secrets.
Most of the works are built on human relationships. And while writing the script, you just need to let your characters live their lives, then you won’t even have to think long about their actions and developments, getting lost in a variety of options. This useful advice also added to the treasury of the seminar listeners.
How to keep the audience's attention. Dmitry Vadimovich made a special emphasis on this secret. Nowadays there is more possibilities make the movie interesting and rich. But in Soviet times for ideological reasons, in films, there was often a struggle between the good and the even better. And the writers had to literally suck the conflict out of their fingers. Now there is an opportunity to raise any topic, to use the natural reactions of a person up to his instincts, it remains only to successfully apply these opportunities.
After some time, Dmitry Vadimovich, like a real teacher, remembered his homework. And our listeners, like real students, of course, for the most part did not fulfill it. The task before them at first glance was simple: to write a film script in the style of the Lumiere brothers, without using any effects, lasting one minute. But even eminent directors coped with this task with difficulty in their time. So, there are great hopes for our young generation, since they think that we can handle it! And this cannot but rejoice.
Moreover, there were people at the seminar who nevertheless did homework despite all the difficulties. Constructive criticism was also present, which was naturally inevitable. But it is from our mistakes that we learn and gain the most valuable knowledge and experience. And watching the heated argument of the girl who wrote the script and defended it like a mother to her own child, and Dmitry Kostromenko, you understand that yes, the process has begun! Everything, as Dmitry Vadimovich told at his first master class.
During the "debriefing" time flew by quickly and imperceptibly, and most importantly - useful. There was even some kind of emotional rapprochement between the participants and the host of the seminar. They began to show activity, ask questions, and this already says a lot. After all, the more a person begins to understand and immerses himself in the material, the more questions he has.
From Small Films to Big Films. This time it seemed that the time at the master class passed somehow especially quickly. And charged with energy and anticipation of the embodiment of their future scenario ideas, the participants simply did not want to let Dmitry Vadimovich go. In the end, he gave one more advice-wish: “In order to grow up to the film industry, in which we will make big feature films with you, you need to do something. And this "something" is a short film. Dmitry Kostromenko also encourages all young talents to without fail participate in competitions and festivals of short films.
Once again, we express our deep gratitude to Dmitry Vadimovich Kostromenko for such an interesting and useful information, for advice and secrets, for believing in us and in the fact that our efforts will start a big movie in our country.
Also, thank you for your hospitality.
Reliability is extremely important quality, which helps to build relationships with new acquaintances, work colleagues or business clients. Therefore, it is important to demonstrate to everyone that you are reliable and deserve their trust. But how?
If you want to be trusted, first learn to trust others.
Building trust between people is certainly not an easy task. We have all been disappointed in people, so opening up to a new acquaintance is not so easy for us. But if you still manage to overcome fears and trust people, then it will, in turn, be easier for them to trust you.
The deepest trust develops gradually, there is no need to rush this process. If you constantly show people that you like them and that you trust them, then people in return will trust you too.
Other people should be comfortable around you
There is nothing worse than being around a person who complains all the time and takes everything pessimistically. Such behavior will not attract colleagues to you, and even more so clients. It is better not to escalate an already difficult situation, but to think soberly, remain optimistic and be able to find ways to solve problems. Then people will feel comfortable with you.
Try to lighten the mood with laughter, stay positive, and make good suggestions to improve the situation. When people see that you're good at solving problems rather than making them worse, you're bound to earn the trust of others.
Body language is very important
Our words and deeds are not the only ways show others who we really are. Not only words are important, our gestures and facial expressions are also important. The importance of body language cannot be neglected, otherwise all our efforts will come to naught. Take this into account when dealing with people with whom you are trying to build trust.
Eye contact (not too much staring, but not running), smile and tone eloquently tell other people about you. If you want to gain trust among your peers, demonstrate in every possible way that you are open and sincere.
Be yourself
Don't try too hard to make people trust you. If you overdo it, you run the risk of appearing insincere and untrustworthy, which is not what you're looking for. If you want to be believed and trusted, be yourself. Sincerity, especially cordial, generous, unpretentious sincerity plays an important role.
So instead of trying to be trustworthy, just relax a little and be yourself. Remember to show genuine concern for others. If people believe that your interest in their fate is genuine, you will be on the right track to building real trust.
Be patient and consistent.
There is no shortcut to achieving the deepest trust - it takes a lot of time and experience in communication. In this case, you should do the right thing - keep your word, do everything possible to show that you can and should be trusted.
If you are patient, consistent, then after some time, you will achieve your goal. Relationships based on long-standing and proven trust are very strong. Of course, developing such a relationship can take a lot of time, but still it is worth all your efforts.